Showing posts with label anti-valentine's day. Show all posts
Showing posts with label anti-valentine's day. Show all posts

Happy (Anti)Valentine's Day!

Monday, February 14, 2011






Happy (Anti)Valentine’s Day, my friends! I know a lot of you (Ginger) love this pesky little holiday, but I’ve truly never been a fan. Ever. So, in honour of my supreme dislike of this holiday, I decided I would do my very own UnValentine’s Day post for you all. Today, I’ve decided to talk about those characters in YA that you can’t help but love to hate. No matter how hard you try, you just want to pull your hair out and punch these characters in the face for their idiocy. So, without further ado, let me introduce to you the ultimate characters I LOVE to hate in literature (for various reasons).

Bella Swan. You silly, son of a B. You whine, and moan, and cry about everything. You break easily. You can’t make up your own mind unless someone makes it up for you first and, frankly, you’re as wishy-washy as they come. You cry in the woods like a baby when your glittery boyfriend breaks up with you to save your life. You decide to sacrifice yourself to save someone that’s immortal (redundant much?) You are everything that girls should NOT be. Way to not be empowering at all and convince all little girls to believe there is a glittery undead man out there for them, too.

Voldemort, you're a tricky b*tch. You tried, and failed to kill a baby? Yes, LOVE protected him, but you being the badass you claim to be really should have known better. That's a pretty huge fail on your part, dude. Then, you go after immortality after the whole "rawr! must kill baby!" thing, and you end up looking like a snake? Where's the plus in that? Minions will bow at your feet, yes, but we're all secretly dry-heaving.

Sauron, you're a big eye. Need I really say more? First of all, you kill little hobbits. Second, you really, really want this lil' gold ring that will make you super duper powerful. Good God, man. Go buy a ring, say it makes you powerful because everyone's scared of you already and they'll believe you, and then get some Visine. Your bloodshot eye is creeping me out.

And the runners up are as follows:

Patch from Crescendo - Thank you for losing every redeeming quality you had in book one to become a truly inconsequential douche in book two. How utterly refreshing.

Bridget from Here Lies Bridget - You should be on The Real Housewives of wherever you live. You would fit in perfectly with your divatude. 

Edward from Twilight - Please. Comb. Your. Hair. Also, please stop sparkling, and go easy on the pasty foundation. You look like a corpse...oh wait...

Quincie from Tantalize - Wait. Who? Guess I don't remember her at all. Oopsies.

As a quick closing note to cover my butt because we book bloggers seem to need to do so these days. These are my very own personal opinions and, frankly, some of these books are absolutely favourites of mine, so please don't take offense to my humble witticisms here.

So tell me, my (Anti)Valentines, which characters do you absolutely love to hate?

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